For some, this tradition may bring up anxiety. What will my parents say to me? Is my cousin going to act in an embarrassing way? How will I get the house clean enough? What if I burn the meal?
We can bring the Dharma into Thanksgiving and turn it into a time of practice, no matter if we love or dread it.
Who are you Thankful for?
You may easily have gratitude for what is in front of you: a warm house, loved ones, and food on the table. We can expand that gratitude by thinking of all of the causes and conditions necessary for those things, especially the people involved. Who built the house? Who grew the food?
Contemplating the kindness of others is an effective way to develop love and compassion. From Venerable Chodron’s book Working With Anger:
Before we can wish sentient beings well, we have to see them as lovable, and to do that, we remember their kindness towards us. Here kindness does not mean that others necessarily had the conscious intention to benefit us, but simply that we have benefited from their actions.
Here we begin by recalling the help, support, and encouragement we have received from family and friends.
Then, we consider the benefit we have received from parents, relatives, and teachers. They have cared for us as best they could. When we were young, they protected us from danger and gave us an education.
In addition, we consider the kindness of strangers. They have grown our food, made our clothes, and constructed our homes and workplaces. They have worked in mines and factories to build the cars, computers, and appliances that we use.
Although we do not know these people personally, without them we could not remain alive, nor could we enjoy all the things we currently use.
You can follow teachings and guided meditations related to this from Venerable Thubten Chodron, Venerable Sangye Khadro, and Venerable Thubten Chonyi.
Grateful Despite Difficulties
Even if you are facing difficulties right now, it is always possible to cultivate gratitude. Instead of focusing on the negative aspects of life, we can reflect on our precious human life.
His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Venerable Chodron explain the value of this in Foundation of Buddhist Practice, Volume 2 in The Library of Wisdom and Compassion:
Recognizing the potential of our precious human life is essential; without it we may spend a lot of time complaining about upsetting events around us, from personal problems to environmental destruction and war.
Consistently focusing on misfortune prevents us from seeing the good in the world, and this narrow and unrealistic vision hinders our well-Âbeing as well as our enthusiasm for Dharma practice.
This view is not only more beneficial, it is more realistic. They continue:
We created tremendous constructive karma in previous lives to have our present opportunity, so we are capable of Dharma practice. We have all necessary conditions to progress on the path and accomplish our spiritual aims in this life, so seeing the future as bleak is unrealistic.
We can cultivate gratitude for having created the karma to have our present freedoms and fortunes. What would it be like if the Dharma did not still exist in the world? If there were not qualified Buddhist teachers, and those that support them? We can be thankful for all of the internal and external conditions needed for Dharma practice.
You can explore this more in teachings from Khensur Wangdak Rinpoche, Venerable Chodron, and Venerable Sangye Khadro. Venerable Sangye Khadro also leads a meditation on this topic.
Pass the Green Beans!
Often, this celebration focuses on food. Meals can be a wonderful time to practice the Dharma, rather than simply satisfying craving.
Venerable Chodron’s book The Compassionate Kitchen is filled with ways to make the sharing of food a spiritual practice for everyone. One example:
In the case of eating, the five contemplations are five mindfulness practices to do while we eat. We practice being mindful of the causes and conditions and the kindness of others by which we have received the food.
We take care to ensure that our mind remains virtuous while we eat, without letting it stray into attachment, complaining, or confusion. We remember to regard the food as wondrous medicine that nourishes our body.
We are mindful that having nourished our body, we want to use it as the vehicle to accomplish our ultimate goal — Buddhahood. To do this, we strengthen our motivation to generate bodhicitta and the wisdom-realizing emptiness.
At the Abbey, we have many practices around food—Venerable Chonyi explains some of them here. Perhaps you can integrate some of them into your Thanksgiving, including the motivation with which you cook or eating a vegetarian meal.
Dive Deeper into the Dharma
While the Abbey is now beginning our winter retreat, you can still connect with us through our extensive library of teachings on YouTube and ThubtenChodron.org.
You might find some of the following playlists particularly relevant:
And it isn’t too late to sign up for the Retreat from Afar, which begins January 4.
